Vegetarian Dee

Monday, August 16, 2010

My Gratitude List

I found this today while cleaning my cabinet in hopes of clearing my head and feeling better..God really has a way of sending me what i need to hear:

"If you let the weight of your problems drag you down, you will not find a solution to lift you up."

So here's my GRATITUDE LIST for tonight to help me see the sunny side of things.

1. Thank you for fast internet so i can blog, check mail and commune with the world and write this list tonight.

2. Thank you for my family: benny my darling genius 3 year old that is independent, brilliant and HAPPY! No matter how crappy i feel, he always manages to make me smile. His heart is soooo big and although he is not yet a master at being gentle, he is extremely sweet and loving.

bogey: for growing up and taking the challenge on with me. for being amazing at what he does at work, for taking more sidelines to make ends meet and let us live more comfortably, for buying a bike so he can lend me his car, for giving us bolt to make us smile, for coming home at night to be with us and put benny to sleep, for being passionate about music and dee :)

bolt: for being adorable and eager to see us and go for walks and jogs with me.

yaya julieann: for being great at managing the house with me, for taking adventures with me in the kitchen and at home, for loving benny and bolt so much.

3. Thank you for my grandparents and everyone in san lo: for taking us in every week and always being there when we need them, for being amazing with ben!

4. Thank you for Mikael and all its teachers: for loving benny and being truly concerned about him and us as a family, for being a space for growth and love.

5. Thank you for the Bernardo's: for making the weekends super fun, for CATS and everything we get to do when we're there (snooze, eat without worrying about what to cook and clean ahahaha!), for being supportive and loving.

6. Thank you for indigobaby and all our clients: for growing with us and letting me live my dreams!

7. Thank you for my health because it is truly wealth! To nigel and cricket!

8. Thank you for my siblings Anton, Jose and Les: for keeping in touch and staying connected. i miss you all and love you soooooo much.

9. Thank you for my cousins and gals: Nash, Katz, Liz, Cams, Alvie, Anj, Tanz, Lex, Paula, Jaims, Mic, Monix, Adi, Jer, Sab, Pam, Crissy, Sam, Noelle, Devaki: for listening and sharing and being rays of light and inspiration.

10. Thank you for Dailyn: for keeping things in order, for her sunshiney smiles, for her patience with benny when he bugs her while she's working..she always manages to make him smile when i get caught up with work..means a lot.

11. Thank you for mom: who is my saving grace..always and forever.

12. Thank you for dad: who is doing the best he can.

13. For Bahay Kalipay: for making me love RAW!!!!!!!!!

14. For GOD: for keeping me sane and serene and happy. For picking me up when i fall and want to give up. For reminding me that my life is OK! For putting people in my life that help me! For giving me bogey and benny. For being there and listening to me rant about life. For being AMAZING and AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's all for tonight because it is almost midnight and i cant wait to cuddle with ben and bo. Goodnight world. THANK YOU for my life.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Payawan

met with benny's teachers today at Mikael and they said

"benny's energy was really different when he got back from your palawan trip. his view was widened and it was really good for him."

gave me a warm feeling inside:) we still tell stories about "payawan" and all its wonder.

back with a new zest for raw food! had too much wheat, carb and sugar daw last week so i am back at raw raw raw!


made a super yummy raw spaghetti last night with coconut and zucchini noodles!! yummmmmeeeee!! benny loved it and my heart really sings when he eats my food!



god, i am so happy to be going down this path with you..feels great to see how i have been lead this way..like the pieces fit together.

excited to join these workshops coming next week at ISIP :)

Monday, August 2, 2010

Life in the Raw, Adventures in the Raw

After attending Pi Villaraza’s Conscious Trance workshop last May, I decided to try going raw for at least two meals a day. By ‘RAW’ I don’t mean raw meat and fish, rather I mean raw fruits and vegetables. So I did it, and I succeeded and felt great for the first two weeks maybe, having fresh buko or fruits for breakfast and a salad I invented for lunch with a sad try at a vegetable smoothie (I was making up most of it, too lazy to research..but that’s not such a bad thing anyway).

At night for dinner, I thought I’d eat heaps from starving myself all day, but in fact I ate less..but, I’d have beef, chicken or fish or sometimes a yummy cooked veggie dish of my concoction too I was trying VCO pulling too in the mornings but never really got to do it for 20 minutes. After the second week of high times with raw breakfast and lunch, I seemed to start getting sick or feeling sluggish in the mornings (now I know it was because I was having a cooked meal for dinner maybe). First came body aches and then a cough and a really terrible sore throat. I healed from all that with my naturopath ways (more concoctions yes), thinking at first that this was a healing crisis from the oil pulling and raw diet. But then it was somewhat a continuous strain of feeling crappy, tired and unhappy.

Sometime in week 4, I woke up at 5am with a really high fever and severe pain in my neck, left side lymph nodes, couldn’t swallow, chills and aching body. It was a Sunday morning and I couldn't see my doctor (who despises being referred to as one since ‘doctors are drug pushers and I am not that’) so I just zapped at home, wrapped myself in bed and tried to sweat the fever away. I ate nothing but a pineapple shake. The next day, I went to see my ‘doctor’ and he said my swollen lymph nodes was caused by ‘all the crap I had done, taken or eaten in my LIFE- drugs, alcohol, junk food, preservatives, bad cleaning solutions, pharmaceuticals (basically EVERYTHING!)’ and that my lymph nodes were full of shit that finally had to come out. I was in so much pain and wanted someone to yank them out of me, didn’t care about the blood or pus that would be all over the place. But he didn’t do that..instead, he gave me some alternative remedies (cayenne for pain, force biotic for my immune system, calculus for the fever, lava for intense detox to name a few), suggested I quit eating meat (seafood and beef) and continue eating more raw if I could plus zapped cold lasers into my immune system to kill the parasites and bacteria in me and ‘bake’ me in a little chamber that would blast me with fresh ozone for at least 20 minutes. I followed his advice because I wanted to get better. I took a few pain killers when the pain was too intense and the fever too high. After doing all that for 5 days straight, I started to feel better. The lumps in my left neck started subsiding, the fever gone. It worked, I didn’t have cancer and wasn’t going to die.


My black mouth- from my Lava drink- take on an empty stomach every morning to cleanse

Basically I was burnt out with my life and needed a vacation he told me, I also needed to rethink my life and see how I could be happier, healthier. Although the symptoms were that of mono, we knew it was more than that and a complete overhaul was necessary. So after a week, I was well and went home (I spent some nights at my grandma’s so she could look after me and bogey stayed with Benny in our house.). The next morning, I woke up with fever yet again and intense pain in my neck AGAIN, but this time it was the lymph nodes on my right side. F#@ct! Not again. Was it the energies in Quingua making me sick- the Meralco posts outside our bedroom, the Esda pollution? So it was one more week of going to the Life Force clinic to get better. Id sun bathe in the morning and at noon (apparently noon sun is healthy and good for depression too!), hardly touched my computer, took it easy and thought about my life. I had a plan but plan B seemed more realistic and it was from a vision that Benny would learn organic farming with Jomar in Bahay Kalipay in Palawan. So I planned my healing adventure with my 3-year-old guru and bought tickets before I changed my mind: three weeks in Bahay Kalipay with Benny- clean air, raw food ALL day, inner dance and yoga for healing and connection and reunion with Monica and Santi. I was set.

In the next week, I went back to doing the things that I thought were ok, slept past midnight, screamed at my helper, got stressed with Benny and bolt..and sure enough in a few days, the pain in my neck was back.

I flew to Palawan with chills, a fever and my wild child. Was I going to survive this adventure with him? I was close to tears.

But just being there was healing: the people, the place, the energy and the fact that I was doing something for myself because I loved me and wanted to get better. Treated myself to a hilot massage that night before sleeping. I cried with Benny while praying that first night. He was missing his ‘own white home and daddy’ and I was a bit scared whether I was where I was meant to be.

I woke up the next day with no more fever, no more aching body (thank heavens!) The challenge was for Benny to take to the raw food diet in a pleasant way. The breakfast was yummy- coconut and fresh fruits with gata, honey and this amazing raw cacao sprinkles (so in love with this that it is still what I eat every morning here in Manila!) I had a tuna pasta baon for him which he ate for lunch the next day as transition before we started him on raw meals. By dinner, we were both having fresh fruits and vegetables. He’d ask for chicken, rice and spaghetti sometimes, but since there was nothing to distract him on the table, he ate what was there, we both did and we actually enjoyed it. I was impressed and inspired.

Buko for Breakfast

Day 2: Pi and I did a healing session and I sobbed in my trance- something that needed to be released. I was having second thoughts about bringing Benny- had I dragged my innocent child into my crisis away from his daddy and life in Quingua? But Pi assured me that we were both where we were meant to be, that maybe the stress I was feeling, Benny was feeling too. I knew this was true. After the session, I realized that I was there to regain my INNER LIGHT- to relearn how to heal myself and trust myself. I had become disempowered by the stress in my life and forgot that I could actually heal myself. This was something an inner voice whispered to me in my first inner dance session a few months back- that we can all heal ourselves. I surrendered myself to the inner dance healing. I found myself massaging my swollen neck while dancing and although there was some pain, I saw that the massaging was actually self-healing.

I enjoyed the stillness of the place. Benny became quite calm and well mannered too, eating raw with me for an entire week straight. We hibernated in our little community and didn’t bother taking a tricycle out of Bahay Kalipay- what for -We had everything we needed.

Breakfast with Tito Piya

I had my favorite dishes- the coco cucumber salad (wonderful and very filling!), the gata-Braggs dressing for sitaw salad (yummee!) Benny loved the raw spaghetti (young coconut for noodles, pesto with tomatoes and onions for sauce- excellent!), the cabbage salad and particularly enjoyed popping the lato balls between his teeth (so did i!). We had lots of fruits and homemade ice cream for merienda. We were raw foodies and we loved it! I felt amazing.


Raw lunch when Papa visited: Lato, Cabbage Salad and Nori rolls! Yummeee!



Ben loves this!


Our super favo: Raw Spaghetti made with young coconut and pesto

In three days, all pain and swelling in my neck disappeared. I am sure that it was a mixture of everything- being at Bahay Kalipay amidst all its wonder and energies, my newfound inner light and the wonderful raw food- alive and healing.


The next days that followed was immersion in the community life at BK. I was able to hire someone to help me out with Benny so I could do my own thing too while I was there. There was the anticipation of Sinag- a raw food baby that was born through a successful home water birth that was mostly unassisted! The labor lasted about ten minutes and we all give credit to Daniw’s raw pregnancy as well as her inner dancing. I missed the actual birth because we were out watching dolphins (bummer!!) but I am totally convinced that going raw makes giving birth manageable and almost painless! No wonder benny was 8.9 lbs, delivered CS (☹) after 14 hours of labor, I was eating everything and anything I could get my hands on while preggy. The result- a wild yet brilliant child named Benicio. I noticed how calm Sinag was, he’d hardly cry at all and could lift his neck up even before he reached his first week. Amazing!

As benny and I ate raw, raw and more raw, I saw how his mood changed (mine as well). He was easier to handle, calmer and happier. He was easy to talk to. After hibernating for 1 week, we had our first cooked meal and instantly benny was back to his hyper self. That night, I also remember having a vivid nightmare and woke up feeling tired and sluggish. I now know that this is because of having cooked food, but only realized this after feeling and seeing the difference since we were eating 100% raw for a week.


Green Smoothie for breakfast means a green mut-nat (mustache in ben's linggo)

In the three weeks that we stayed in BK, benny and I had a total of 9 cooked meals out of 63. I was proud of this achievement, especially since I was able to get Benny to detox and eat healthy with me.


Mango and Petchay ice candy: Perfect Snack for little boys!

Now that I am back home to Manila, I am still committed to having as much raw as possible. I still have the same breakfast every morning- saba, mangoes, avocado with gata, honey and my super favorite raw cacao sprinkle! I also make myself raw lunch and sometimes, raw dinner. Still super love the cucumber coconut salad and raw spaghetti! Benny and I planted okra last week because we both love it raw and enjoyed picking and eating at BK.

My commitment to my son is to keep offering him healthy raw food as much as I can in hopes that he shares raw meals with me. There are lots of temptations and it is much harder to control since we are back to urban living with all its commercialization. I am blessed that my son loves fruits like me- santol, bananas, rambutan and chico and as long as these are available for merienda and snacks, then he is less likely to ask for junk like Stick-O or Bread Pan;) Unfortunately, he is back to eating meat and cooked food, but at least has a lot of fruits and okra for snacks. I have let go of getting stressed about this, but know deep in my heart that raw is the answer to ALL sicknesses in the world! So as the saying goes- you are what you eat..and benny and I will always have our three-weeks in raw food heaven to look back at with bliss and loads of memories! Here’s to more raw adventures!


Some links for those who are interested about going RAW:
http://www.rawfamily.com/
http://www.living-foods.com/recipes/applepie.html
http://www.thebestofrawfood.com/

re raw food, NO training needed, just research about it and see why it is the best for you- it addresses ALL physical, emotional, mental, even spiritual issues:) so now, don't look at a fruit or veggie and see it as a supplementary food, but as your main course- it's ALIVE!